May 23, 2017 / 

Robert Dysell

Who would be the world's worst CMO?

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The world of marketing is notorious for having some quirky characters—some easier to work with than others. But whether you think your marketing department is the bee’s knees or a flaming dumpster fire, at least you can take heart in the fact that you’re not stuck with one of these people as your Marketing Director.

 

We take a look at 10 of the world's worst CMO candidates.  

1. Kim Jong-un

You’ve got a fresh and edgy idea? That’s nice and all, but keep it to yourself. Otherwise you risk losing your internet privileges in the office, which is going to make sending in that PowerPoint a bit tricky. Sanctioned ideas only, please.

2. Kanye West

Expect to see a lot of Kanye-accredited material. Think: everyone in the office wearing Yeezy clothing, which is basically glorified underwear. But hey—you might get some incredulous press from the art world. Because the media loves absurdity like Kanye loves Kanye.

3. Donald Trump

Your content would probably end up turning into a load of alternative facts, including data about your CMO’s hand size. And if you decide to speak up against some of the more, er, morally questionable content? You’re fired.

4. Dory from “Finding Nemo”

Very lovable, means well… but a bit forgetful. Tends to make friends with all kinds of creatures in the office, but you probably shouldn’t trust her with a whole lot of responsibilities. Will probably forget her login and password about 7,000 times.

5. Vladimir Putin

See: Kim Jong-un.

 


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6. Kendall Jenner

No one’s quite sure what she does for her day job, but she sure shouldn’t be in charge of marketing (see: Pepsi ad). She meant to unite, but instead she made people like Pepsi even less than they already did.

7. Gordon Ramsey

He’s one opinionated dude, which is completely fine, so long as it’s a steak flambé you want an opinion on. Otherwise, his fiery temper isn’t going to help you out much. Like they say, if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the conference room.

8. Nicolas Cage

He just keeps staring off into the distance, making contorted faces, sprinting through the hallway on a moment’s notice. Definitely don’t put him in the driver’s seat—of your marketing department or of an actual car.

9. Darth Vader

Very hard to understand, so meetings tend to be filled with people cupping their ears and asking him to repeat himself. Plus, all this talk about his kids is getting a little old.

10. The Water Cooler

Still the best option on this list, because most inanimate objects are better than these other guys. Great for bringing people together, sparking conversation, and always keeps its cool no matter what the situation. Not a great note-taker, though.

 

Hopefully nobody on this list reminded you of your CMO, or worse still: yourself. A workplace that puts out great content starts with a boss who’s receptive to ideas, and tactful in their implementation. Luckily, the Pickit Business Office Add-in lets you give your team in-app access to the company image bank. It's an easy way to empower your staff and still maintain brand compliance, making your company’s content a whole lot better, whether your CMO (or you) is Yoda or Darth Vader. Just don’t come to us for advice on how to grill a steak flambé.

Don't be a dic... tator. Use the Pickit platform to empower your employees and create brand ambassadors.

 

 

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